what I sound like watching Severance
hold on why is that guy doiHOLY SHIT
Okay, time to watch Severance
…
What’s going on here?
Who’s that guy?
Why’s he walking around?
Where is he?
Do I know him?
Did I miss an episode and not realize it or someth-…
Oh, I get it now
I see what’s happening
He just wears sweaters now
Wait
No
What’s that lady doing?
Why does she have that?
Hold on
Who’s in that room?
Wait
HOLY SHIT
WOW
WHOA
IT’S HIM
I KNEW IT
Wait…
…
Okay, no
False alarm
Where’s that guy going now?
Hey, isn’t that the lady from season one?
Is her hair different?
Oh never mind
It’s a different lady
Where’s she going?
Man, this is a long hallway
I don’t think I would like working at this comp-…
Wait
Hold on
OH SHIT
OH WOW
IT WAS THE SAME LADY
I THOUGHT SO
THIS CHANGES EVERTH-…
Wait
What are we doing now?
Was that real?
Was that a flashback?
Hey, who’s this guy?
Are we on the outside now?
What happened to Christopher Walke-…
Oh, there he is
Why’s he doing that?
Is this anoth-
OH SHIT
I THOUGHT THIS MIGHT HAPPEN
IT’S CONNECTED
I FIGURED IT OUT
…
Wait
No
Hold on
Okay maybe not
Hey, where’s she going now?
Upstairs?
That’s weird
Is she meeting with the guy with the hair?
Or the creepy Bluetooth lady?
Where’s the child from earlier?
Damn these are long hallways
Wait, that’s a new room
Wait
Hold on
Whose head is that?
TURN AROUND
TURN AROUND
TURN AROUND
WAIT
THAT’S…
HOLY SHIT
WOW
OKAY
WHOA
HOLY SHIT
THIS MAKES SO MUCH SENSE
THAT’S WHY THE THING EARLIER WAS DOING THAT
I KNEW IT
…
Okay…
…
Hold on…
…
Wait…
STUFF I TYPED
— my weekly Severance blog for Vulture, which introduces a pretty stupid theory I stand by
— my Friday newsletter, which opened with a thing about the Oscars but more importantly covered the multiple idiotic boat thefts that happened last week
STUFF I CLICKED ON
— loved this blog by Barry Petchesky titled, beautifully. There Are Other People In The World
— glad to see Britt Lower get some recognition for what she’s doing on Severance
— Danny McBride interviewed Walton Goggins and it was a lovely read
— speaking of Goggins, here’s a screencap that will be useful in your various group chats
— Katy Perry is going to space
— Conan talked about how that Adam Sandler bit at the Oscars happened
— the Michael Crichton estate is still suing over The Pitt
— “I’m not a bad actress. I got an Emmy nomination. How do you think I did that?”
— I respect Francis Ford Coppola a lot for writing a searing message about Hollywood and the Razzies under a black and white picture of his face looking disappointed in them
— I should warn you that you will never be the same after you watch the commercial for the very fancy toilet but I do realize that this warning will only make you want to watch it more
Okay, that’s all for this week. Please subscribe and upgrade and think about this while walking down a long hallway at work.
"Jewelry: Walton's own" 😂