Gus Barfer
Zeke Powerade
April Showers
May Flowers
June Heatwave
Greta Nightmare
Vic Loose
Judd Caramel
Daytona Sanders
Leviticus Pronto
Detective Brick Stone
Rhonda Peppers
Hunch McAdoo
Lox Dagger
Pow Galactus
Chick Hatch
Supreme Court Justice Flop Sandwedge
Dr. Bebe Bongo
Emilio Hamsters
Bonk Caruthers
Tina Wallop
Yolanda Baltimore
Bucky Croissant
Buzz Tucson
Meg Wobble
Peg Bobble
Poof Guillotine
Elmo St. Crouton
Heather Feathers
Lolita Tuscany
Tuck Python
STUFF I TYPED
— wrote about Slow Horses for Vulture because it is my favorite show about idiots saving the world
— wrote about The Fall Guy for Polygon because it is streaming now and I swear to God you will like it
— wrote about the new Pepsi Gladiator commercial and the old one you think ran during the 2004 Super Bowl even though it never actually aired in America
STUFF I CLICKED ON
— Alan Sepinwall ranked the 100 best episodes of all time
— Vince Mancini wrote a really interesting blog about Adam Sandler
— few things are more in my wheelhouse than “Caity Weaver investigation into just how useless the penny is”
— I am fascinated by the dorks who make six figures running around NYC and filing citizen reports about cars idling too long on the street
— here’s the trailer for the big new documentary where Will Ferrell and Harper Steele crisscross the country after Steele came out as trans and get a good look at how both America and their friendship are adapting to new things (it looks very good)
— via Weaz here is a fun little subreddit dedicated to restaurants serving food on anything but plates
— I love the seal named Brian
— do not take financial advice from randos on TikTok
— the Philly Specials’ new Christmas album will feature Boyz II Men
— world's biggest Kansas City Chiefs fan sentenced to 17 years in prison for armed robbery
— Winona and Keanu are adorable
— Twitter is banned in Brazil so the reporters at last week’s Eagles-Packers game in São Paulo were texting their tweets to their wives back in America and having them copy/paste and publish each one, which is cute but also feels like a thing that would get really old for the wives after about 36 hours (“babe, tweet out this pic of me at the beach” probably goes over poorly with a person who is wrangling the children and making dinner and doing all the parenting duties solo while the aforementioned spouse is at the aforementioned beach in Brazil, right?)
— government employee allegedly bribed with delicious duck dinners
— I try to keep this all relatively politics-free but I need you to know that there is a scandal brewing that prominently features a man named “Louis Money”
— “Cinnamon Toast Crunch bacon” feels like both a meme taken too far and absolutely something I would try once anyway
— I love a Ridley Scott press tour
— please watch this
Okay, that’s it for this week. Please subscribe and share and make a restaurant reservation under the name Judd Caramel
I need Louis Money to insist that it’s pronounced Looey Monè
Several of those names are definitely porn star aliases. Also, I presume the one is pronounced "June He-ah-TWAH-ve"?